Friday, November 17, 2017

Uncertainty- A Dream Come True

In a few days I am going on a trip to India. I'm going with two missionary families, one family from Cambodia and the other from India but serving in Cambodia. I'll be there for an entire two months, and will be doing so many different things throughout several states. We will be building homes for families facing persecution, teaching at churches in different parts of the country, running a kids camp, joining in an Advent program, and so on... To finish it all off, I'm going to spend a few months on my own with Mother Teresa's Home for the Dying in Kolkata.

You see, I have wanted to go to Mother Teresa's center since I was about 8 years old. As a child she was the person I most looked up to, my favorite celebrity.. I have read countless biographies about her and her work. I hoped that one day I would be able to save up enough money to at least go see her center where it all started.

A few months ago I decided I wouldn't put off this dream any longer, after all I'm already on this side of the world. I told my boss and dear friend that I wanted to take some time off to go to India and spend a couple weeks at Mother Teresa's center in Kolkata. My friend laughed in surprise and  proceeded to tell me that their family was planning a trip to India and could use the help, she asked if I could come with them and stay after to visit Kolkata.

Now here I am, about to go do that which I always dreamed about... and so much more. I am finding that it is not only my dreams that are coming true, but more is being added to them. I never even thought I would be able to stay with local families rather than at a hotel, I never considered being able to travel to multiple states of India rather than only one. It is all so much more than I ever could have imagined.

Along with all of these new opportunities come new uncertainties as well. I'll be giving a sermon to hundreds, which scares the living daylights out of me. I'll be unable to work for money and left hoping it works out. I'll be sharing personal parts of my story with strangers. At the tail-end when I go to Kolkata, for the first time in my life I'll be alone in a city where I don't know a soul. It is all so much.

And let me tell you, it is 100% worth it.

There is so little we can be certain of, only so much can be held in these small hands of mine. Any experience that can be perfectly planned out and understood is too small to change you. I'm finding that when everything goes according to my small plans, I miss out on so much. These transformative moments cannot be planned or manufactured. The dream come true lies in the great unknown.

I get the sense that these next two months will be something I look back on for years to come and say, "that fundamentally changed who I am". I have butterflies in my stomach like one often does at the beginning of a grand adventure. And I know that so very much of it will not go according to plan.

So bring it on.