I grew up believing that if I wasn't actively fighting for something, I was giving up. And I hate giving up. In some ways it was good, it gave me the strength to fight depression and hold on when it hurts. But it was also toxic in other ways. I held on to beliefs that belittled me. I refused to give up on destructive people and situations, and in the process I became smaller.
Then slowly but surely, I began giving up.
I gave up on being the caretaker for my family. I realized the best thing I could do for them was let them see me chase my dreams. I found that by leaving I gave them room to breathe and gave myself room to become.
I gave up on my religion. I let go of all the rules, spoken and unspoken, that told me what to do and who to be. I found that outside of that box was an entire world of meaning and depth and holiness. I found God.
I gave up on helping people. I let myself be the helpless one, and in doing so I found that loving will always bring more healing than helping ever could.
I gave up on my dream. In a country I loved with the job I always dreamt of, I decided to leave. Because I realized that the whole world means nothing if you aren't experiencing it with your full self. I'm finding myself.
I gave up on fighting against the current and decided to give in. I'm learning that giving up is sometimes the strongest thing we can do. I found that the flow of this current will take me where I need to go.
Then slowly but surely, I began giving up.
I gave up on being the caretaker for my family. I realized the best thing I could do for them was let them see me chase my dreams. I found that by leaving I gave them room to breathe and gave myself room to become.
I gave up on my religion. I let go of all the rules, spoken and unspoken, that told me what to do and who to be. I found that outside of that box was an entire world of meaning and depth and holiness. I found God.
I gave up on helping people. I let myself be the helpless one, and in doing so I found that loving will always bring more healing than helping ever could.
I gave up on my dream. In a country I loved with the job I always dreamt of, I decided to leave. Because I realized that the whole world means nothing if you aren't experiencing it with your full self. I'm finding myself.
I gave up on fighting against the current and decided to give in. I'm learning that giving up is sometimes the strongest thing we can do. I found that the flow of this current will take me where I need to go.
